God woke up in a crummy mood. Why?
The prior evening Satan, to put it bluntly, had smeared His nose in feces.
How it started was that Satan had been pestering Him unmercifully to accept that he had opened a joint at a secret locale where he dispensed his brand of punishment to those masses of people deemed naughty; he called the place, Hell. Knowing Satan to be a consummate liar, God for hundreds of thousands of years—maybe millions, even billions—had been dismissing his claim as nonsense. Still, He couldn’t overlook the sick news that on Planet Earth evil was rampant. More upsetting still was that greater and greater numbers of the humanoids dwelling there were disappearing.
The prior evening, just before retiring for the night, He had a major blow up with his archenemy.
“You’re a master deceiver and falsifier, always have been. You keep talking about this place, Hell, but I’ve never seen it.”
Satan laughed, a vile expression of humor coupled by a poke with his burning three-pronged spear into God’s ribcage.
“That kind of hostility proves nothing. Why don’t you admit you’ve made up the story? One honest statement won’t ruin the reputation you’ve built, I promise,” God noted derisively.
Satan this time smirked, drooling stinking green venom from his fiery mouth. Then to demonstrate his great power of impersonation, in an instant he donned himself in a Special Trooper outfit. He was wearing a Kejo helmet, a tactical vest and night vision goggles. In his left hand was a Colt 1911 .45 pistol and in the right he held a M16 rifle that he was menacingly pointing at God.
“You’re disgusting. But I’ll ask you one more time,” God shouted, so loud that the sound waves blew several nearby planets off orbit, shooting them like pin balls, in turn careening a few stars into the mouth of a black hole.
Still refusing to respond verbally to God, Satan taunted his nemesis by turning around and passing gas in God’s face.
“Just go to Hell,” God sneered as he turned to walk away.
“Did you get your answer, God?” Satin finally spoke, now with a giant gloating guffaw.
God was stunned by the realization that his angry outburst to Satan actually tattled on the fact that He might believe Hell existed. He slowly ambled away, stomping both of His feet and gritting His teeth in digest to the abasement He’d just suffered.